Mental Health

I’m feeling completely disoriented and stunned and just….having a time processing everything. The digital world is changing too quickly. It feels like the ground has turned into lava. Maybe I’m not the only one feeling this way.

Whenever I talk or interact with people I feel I don't talk like a "normal" person would nor I feel other people's feelings towards me are positive.

For me it wasn't till the depression got overwhelming when I was 23.

MeI've never realized it could get this bad. I've always been miserable my whole life, but i feel like i've hit a new low. The combination of middle eastern politics, toxic environment and stressful worklife is such a toxic one... I took a day off today, because i was so anxious that all i could do is lie on the couch and pray it passes. Didn't have anyone to help me, since everyone i knew was asleep (i wake up very early) or i didn't want to annoy them. I felt like i just wanted to jump off the building to stop the pain. Then i took zoloft a couple of minutes ago. I'm not having a panic attack anymore (hence me creating this post) but i still feel so shitty. I've had a horrible day before it even started, and i have a huge backlog of work that i have to finish in two days. Usually i forget to take zoloft, since i felt like it doesn't have an effect at all on me (maybe i'll make another post about this later) But i guess it helps a little. Bah, rant over.

My answerI never

When I’m distressed or anxious I find myself in these endless trains of thought. Just stuck in a loop. What helps you break free? I try to come back to reality, or use some coping techniques like breathing, but I’d love to hear what works for you.

Foreword: this'll all come out as a vent, because I don't even know what question I could be asking right now. There's nothing left to want from where I'm standing, at least nothing realistic. This doesn't mean I want it to be a monologue, so if anyone has anything to offer, or to add, or if my words simply resonate so much that you'd want to vent, please do so. Sincerely.

I always make myself do something outside like pop to the shops. I also make myself do chores like batch cook. Then I distract myself with twitch it's easy and mindless

Life hit me like a train, not too much free time now 🫠 that's also why i completely forgot to create the weekly thread, 3 days late.

Short Version - it's a list of things to do instead of doing dumb shit making life altering-ly bad decisions.

Full disclosure: I had to quit my meds earlier this week because of side effects (tachycardia).

Like, if she asks me some question that I'm afraid to answer, I literally just freeze. I also find myself in the mentality of "it's not worth talking to them unless they're forcing answers out of you".

I'm not a professional, but I figure this might help someone. If you're feeling that you're approaching your limit and you can't take it anymore. Get off the internet.

When i first heard the news, it felt surreal. But when that passed, i felt nothing.

I don’t know why I’m posting this. Maybe I’m hoping for some epiphany or for someone to point to a way out I’ve missed though I’m certain that’s not going to happen. 

I love drawing so much and it's taken years to get to a point where I'm satisfied enough to share my drawings. Only thing is now there's AI and I'm disturbed by the fact there's so many people who prefer AI generated art and will feel no remorse using it since it is basically an art theft machine. This whole thing has absolutely demolished my mental health over the last few years since AI generators went mainstream. I'm paranoid as fuck and want to get rid of all my current devices but, I still rely on the ipad heavily for drawing and I did the research and there's literally no work around to avoid my art being stolen in some way by spyware or keyloggers or whatever, the US government...the whatever other governments. Hide your data, hide your art. They stealin everybody's art out here. I just want to be able to live my life and enjoy doing what I do without this ugly, uncanny valley shadow following me. There's like a million communities on lemmy I had to block that are dedicated to posting ai generated art, and feels almost like an act of spite like they made the accounts just to hurt real artists, but maybe it isn't. Maybe they really do think it's real art and anyone hurt by it is just too sensitive.

I am an individualist. It's strange to be an individualist, because, for example, when you are a college student, you often feel alienated when almost everyone else has friends or close friends in groups, while you are the only one who enjoys walking and eating alone. It feels alienating almost all the time. And what's worse, someone tried to gaslight me: 'Why are you sitting there alone? Come here and sit with them,' enjoying sitting with people who make me uncomfortable every time. Being alone isn’t loneliness—it’s just the way I feel most at peace. Yet, society keeps questioning it. #IndividualistLife #SoloJourney #Alienation #IndependentMind #CollegeLife #WalkingAlone #EatingAlone #SocialPressure #IntrovertStruggles #GaslightingAwareness #PersonalFreedom

I feel like there's nothing to look forward to anymore.

It's effecting my work and mu boss seems ready to fire me and i will lose my apartment. I am angry all the time now and I worry I am alienating friends and family. I am fatigued all day long and want nothing more then just sleep and all I can do is lay in bed and hope I have a good night and sleep for maybe three hours and I don't know what to do. I can't even afford therapy.

Tl:dR: How can I deal with my hypersensibility without becoming a non-empathic and cold person?

FINALLY ON TIME THIS WEEK

Me on the Fediverse, or specifically Lemmy, trying not to depend on the number of upvotes and downvotes for my instant and temporary happiness, as well as my mental health problems that arose from downvotes.

A bit of an ask I'm throwing out there before I go to bed, but I need some advice so...

I am implementing my zero-tolerance policy on my social media. If I come across an unhelpful or hurtful comment, I report it to the moderators and block the user. I prioritize maintaining a safe environment for myself. Being vulnerable does not imply that I am open to being mistreated or taken advantage of.

What's the point of everything? What are we heading towards? There's got to be a reason why we were put here. Why was I put here? To sit at a computer all day and work for another person making spreadsheets and drawing a bird over and over again? Surely that can't be the reason.

Hi. My name is Daniel. Today I woke up at around 18:00 and the day is almost over.

I think I have the potential for overusing Lemmy and the Fediverse, which has caused me to overlook other important areas and activities, such as real-life responsibilities, and I feel somber without them. I also have the potential for dependence on interactions here for my well-being and confidence. What people usually describe this as is "Lemmy or social media addiction." I really need to recognize any patterns in my own use of Lemmy and other social apps.

EDIT: I DO NOT NEED ADVICE ON WHY IT HAPPENED. THERE IS A VERY GOOD REASON WHY MY DAD USED TO CHOKE WHEN HE WAS ALIVE. MY LOVED ONES == MY DAD.

(i forgot. Again. Only for three days though, hopefully it isn't a big deal)

She loves all the masculine things, detests pretty dresses and such. Even speaks with contempt if she sees the more hyper feminine styled people. Absolutely loves all the macho movies with 2D women serving as a background to the main brooding male. Anime is for losers and kids, well that’s maybe not super untrue but still.

I'm depressed right now so that's part of it. But I feel like I just exist, I just go through the motions in life. I do everything right (exercise, social functions, counselling etc) but it's not a particularly enjoyable life.

Hey everyone,

A couple of weeks ago I pulled out without looking, this is the second time this has happened since I have started driving, a car flipped and ever since than all I get is bad news, nothing has been good. My friends are more distant, I considered sucide a couple of days ago and my friends stopped me. I recently found out I am getting sued on top of everything. I just feel like I deserve bad things and my existance will be pain for as long as I keep walking this earth. I work a souless retail job, and my friends are tired of hearing me complain cause it's easier than their jobs.

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Talk and vent about recent experiences, thoughts, and emotions. Anything is allowed.

For suicide hotlines world-wide: https://www.therapyroute.com/article/helplines-suicide-hotlines-and-crisis-lines-from-around-the-world

Usually I am a person who is generally reasonable I think and mature. However yesterday it all went 180 degrees. It all started in the morning, I already felt very energetic on that day but not in a good way so to say but in this kind of way like when you drink too much coffee and can't calm yourself.

I have been going to therapy off and on for years and whenever I bring up my desire to date and my difficulties with it I have gotten back to just work on myself and online I have seen "if you aren't happy alone you won't be happy in a relationship". I have major depression and have had it for years. Am I supposed to just hope it goes away? Wait until my entire life has passed?

This might look stupid and completely insignificant compared to other people posting here, but this community looks the most appropriate to ask, so here is the situation : sometimes when I wake up (and only then), i have huge, existential fear (panic) that I will die. It lasts for a dozen of seconds, it's the only thing i can think about. The fear is profound, and infinitely large, there is nothing i can do to stop it myself.

So, I am autistic, I dont really have friends except online, and i have a few other diagnoses like suspicion of schizophrenia and suspicion of psychosis. And, about once a year, I start walking down a hallway of insanity, ending in a big multiple day long paranoid attack- where I just lash our at someone and try to ruin their life because of some really insignificant thing. Last time I lashed out at someone because I misunderstood something, and I went down a paranoid spiral where I would try to ruin their life because I thought they wanted to ruin mine.

I’m new to this app and loneliness led me there. I’ve been feeling so Hmmm so heavily alone lately and again o just woke up from a bad dream. I just wish I had someone or support and it really hurts that I don’t

I'm 21/male and already lived on my own but I was forced to move back to my toxic parents 2 years ago because I wasn't able to live on my own because of my depression that was caused by the trauma from my parents (the only alternative I had was being homeless).

I figure I should share a little about myself so here goes.

I've been crying almost daily for a year now, while trying my ass off to keep a stiff upper lip. I've been desperately hanging on to the standard justifications (maybe tomorrow it'll be better, can't let them win, this will pass, won't rain forever, etc., etc.) out of sheer inertia, but I honestly can't say that I believe any of them.

Hey there, I’m from Germany and have mental health issues such as depression and was wondering how prevalent this topic is in America.

Listen. Y'all need to understand something. I know systemic issues are bad right now. But the constant posting of "I'm not supposed to be happy when society sucks!" needs to stop. This is supposed to be an affirming space with positive attitudes towards mental health and mental health treatment in general.

You can’t openly discuss suicidal feelings with a therapist, because then they can strip you of your rights and send you to a place that might be the hospital out of *One Flew Out of the Cookoo’s Nest* - and then charge you thousands for the stay.

Being born in 2003 I experienced a glimpse of the world when everything wasn't hyper connected and everyone didn't yet have a phone with all these addictive social media apps and I really miss those times.

Hi, I 21/male have depression, ADHD and most likely also OCD.

I'm a 21 year old guy and struggle with depression for my whole life because of traumatic things I experienced from my parents.

cw sucidal thoughts spoilerI just feel like in general no one cares about me, and I think it's time I admit that everyone in my life exept maybe my mom is better off without me, and that me being dead would be seen as a blessing one day. I know it's my fault me and my friends drifted apart, everyone thinks im weird once again but no one says anything cause I am suicidal, the truth is I should of kept my depression to myself, and tried to remain as a far away emotionally as possible instead I told them about my truama and how I felt. That was such a huge mistake, no I feel like everyone avoids me, and tbh I am huge werido who does not deserve to exist, I am "trans" which means taking hrt and looking like a man, dispite being on hrt for 3 years my genetics are cursed and I look like a cursed crossbred ass creature instead of a person, I am an abosute disgrace to the trans community. but anyway I told my friends that I was sucidal and they did the usual worry, but I realize now that they genunely think I am weired, also I am austisic and extwermely socially awkward. I honestly feel like I am perhaps worse than chris chan maybe. I genunely am aware though and actively hate myself for what I have become. today it really hit me when no one was interested in letting me use their phone charger cause of course my peice of shit self left it at work and will likely have to buy a new one now. I have curly hair but my dumb ass did not maintain it and now it's matted beyond anything I can do myself, I am exteremly broke due to some car related shit and cannot afford to get ap rofessintal invovled, if my mom saw it she would panic cause she would know I was depressed but she handles my depression by being depressed about it, so I don't think she will help me. In terms of methods, ive considered a couple, one was to try to shoot myself in the head with a 9mm, however I have seen videos of survivors of shooting themselves and I feel like I would be misrible, I have also considered maybe crashing my car at high speeds into a solid object, I drive a pruis so it would take a minute to reach 100mph if it can even get there and I am not even sure if that would produce enough force to kill me. I am genunelly intrested cause I don't really see a way out anymore. everyone secretly hates me, and I genunelly have nothing else to turn too, no one who cares honestly.

I have chronic anxiety and PTSD from my time in the service. When the pressure in my chest gets two great. I end up watching a Sad movie and just ugly cry and I get relief for a few hours. Like as in zero symptoms then it all rushes back like someone is filling my lungs with water but it's better for about a month give or take .

Hello there. I'm a 21 year old guy with strong depression and many insecurities. I'm always trying to be perfect and my biggest fear is to be a bad person. I'm not a pedophile at all. For me it's the exact opposite because I hate pedophilia and think it's the most disgusting thing in the world.

Went to renew my driver's license today only to learn that I had a mental health hold put on me

I still want to die and I feel like my friends who wanted me to get help are better off without me. Today I was sitting on the couch venting about some car related stuff, than how I was anxious about not getting a job in our new city, than without warning everyone leaves I feel like they got tired of me venting and just left. If I ask they will deny it but I know I’m a burden and I really wouldn’t blame them if they kicked me out if I went to the phycward and lost job. I feel like they don’t want me to die but also don’t know they are better off without me and I’m mentally abusive cause I vent and I tire people out but no one can say anything cause I’m suicidal.

Idk if it's because of my ADHD or Depression but I struggled my whole life with finding a healthy balance to all these temptations that this world offers.

sucide noteMy life just hasn’t gone well, I’ve made plan to kill myself on Jan 5th, nothing in the past couple of years has worked out, and I feel like a failure. I’ve tried so many times to remain positive but I’ve always been met with disappointment. And I’m tired of being unhappy I’m gonna try to list most of my disappointments in order to reason than talk a bit about my plan The beginning is a grew up knowing I was trans, I always related more to the girls and wanted to hang out with them and be one, when I was 14 I realized I was transgender, at 20 I started HRT. My original goal was I was gonna look somewhat like a women at least, none of that happened, I very much still look male. I also went to college and graduated with a degree in computer information systems with honors, I worked tirelessly, now I work at Walmart with zero chance of career advancement, if I miss even one day I’m fired since I’m at 4 points. I had to work though the flu a couple of weeks ago, and very recently I bought a car, I was really happy and excited. Today I realize it has an issue with a break equator which on the 2007 pruis is a total loss. On top of all of this historically people are only my friend cause they feel bad, they often times have admitted to me they thought I was annoying but thought I was “mentally disabled” I’m autistic and I’ve never really been loved by anyone. I called my mother and said I wanted to die, but all she did is panic and said if I killed myself over everything in my life I’m stupid, and she would also kill herself. I just feel like nothing in my life has ever worked out. Nothing ever worked out. My plan now is to clean my room, up to moving out standards, on the day off, im gonna wake up, take a shower, and drive to academy and express interest into a hunting pistol. Im gonna do research into what animal. This is to ensure they don’t get suspicious about me buying a gun and they seem to think I know what I’m doing. Once I’ve secured the gun I’m gonna drive to a parking lot that is empty during the week about 40 minutes outside of downtown, and I will call 911 and explain I found a dead body when asked details I will hang up, and I will pull. The trigger, pointing the gun at the center of my head. My car, my 6k in debt, and my horrible life is will all be a distant memory. Do I think my roommates might cry and do I think my mother might do it. Yes I’m sorry I’ve tired. My father abused me. My mom depended on me emotionally. I was dealt this hand and I’m guessing the universe doesn’t want me to exist. Maybe in another universe something worked out, I had a life with love and a family. A childhood that was okay. People who liked me. I’m so sorry to everyone who is reading this after the fact..

::: Cw suicide 

I'm young enough to be on my parents' health insurance plan, they have enough funding to pay for copays/deductibles (it's not really a money issue, is what I'm trying to say). But my parents (especially my mother), opposes medication and tells me I need to "Just Go Outside".

Hey welcome to my ramble of the day.

Hey everyone, I'm pretty sure I have a deep rooted fear of abandonment, I'm scared most of the time that my friends will leave me once they find someone more fun or interesting to be with, I don't outwardly act like it but it's really like that and it makes me feel anxious to start new relationships, I don't know if I can trust anyone actually likes me, it's pretty bad because there is this girl I LOVE whomst I spend all my time with she's told me she loved me AND I STILL CAN'T BRING MYSELF TO ACTUALLY BELIEVE HER. It's destroying me. I feel like no one I meet will meet my need for reassurance, it's probably making me needy which I can't help, but which definitely makes me less desirable of a person.

So my immediate family has been very avoidant of my girlfriend of nearly 6 years

It is less than a week till Christmas and I still have not gotten anything ordered or anything, I have felt depressed and low energy these pasts couple of months, I cannot even keep up with my house chores which angers my roommates. I don't think they want to hear about my mental health anymore, I think they are gonna be very upset when they bought me thing and I got nothing or just offered cash since I really have no energy to shop for them and I have no idea what to get and this has been a major cause of stress these past couple of weeks on top of non stop work, with only one day off in between. I just feel like I am crashing out and wondering if I should just move out and be homeless since I cannot really be the best roommate right now

Hey there, thanks for taking the time to read. I've been feeling bad for some time now and figured now is a good a time as any to share.

Here's what happened in the span of two months. My aunts mom died due to a sickness. My uncle died due to sickness and basically giving up. My other aunt got diagnosed with the worst disease you can get so she's starting treatment. This morning, we just got the news that my grandma might be bedridden for the rest of her life due to a medical condition.

New user here so be nice or something

be me, a gifted programmer, living in a huge house, pregnant gf, good grades on prestigious uni

I've been put on Depakote instead of Olanzapine who made me put on 97lbs My psychiatrist says it is weight neutral, internet and research says otherwise. I am not looking for medication advice just anecdotes on whether Depakote made you gain weight or not. Or if it even causes the same ravenous hunger as an antipsychotic.

Hey all

It's been 2 years since I've had stomach issues, especially puking. 2 years ago I went to the ER and they didn't even care I went home with a prescription to check my liver but a doctor didn't even examine me. At the time I was smoking which I thought was the cause back then, but then I kept puking since I stopped (I am still cigarettes free, no vape, no nicotine, no weed, no anything) and feeling something weird in my stomach. My liver results came back okay. Then at my second go to the ER 1 year ago the doctor said I might have an ulcer because of the meds I take and go check with my GP to have an appointment I said to her my GP was brushing off my problems saying they came from my weight gain so she wrote a letter to him but : My GP didn't really care and brushed it off again and gave me anti reflux medication.

I'm hesitant to describe my mental state... it hasn't really changed. I'm miserable. I've been miserable since I was a child. I don't know if it's what clinicians would call depression. Can you be depressed for, essentially, your whole life? I'm experiencing some personal and financial set backs right now, and I'm wondering... I don't feel different. When I'm doing the 'normal' things--working, socializing with relatives, 'hobbies'--I'm still miserable. When I'm unemployed and isolated I feel miserable. I feel stuck. Trust me when I say I don't feel human. I don't relate to others. They appear just like that: others. I have no interest in anything.

I bought a property near a church, about 30 meters. When I bought it and years before the bells were "off" and it's barely used.