Transfem

So I bought myself some Makeup. Got some mascara, two differently colored pouders, some brushes and sponges and some eyeshadow.

I'll go firstt:

I've heard of this from friends where people will feel like their assigned gender at birth but in a sorta trans way, like an AFAB person who feels like a woman but in an AMAB or trans way. They often identify more with trans people, so she would identify more with trans women than cis women.

I've been a lurker in this community for a long time, and I've thought about posting with long diatribes talking about how being in the closet and not feeling free to be yourself is soul-crushing and how terrible I feel sometimes, but tonight I wanted to make a post about how today when I stopped to get a coffee the girl behind the counter told me she liked my (shoulder-length) hair and that it suited me, and then gave me an extra espresso shot for free. I'm fighting hair loss and while it might not be the most obvious thing to others, it feels very obvious to me and I'm incredibly insecure about it.

I bought purse myself, had one bought online but has broken zipper, now bought one myself in store and I'm out drinking mojito. I feel happy <3

So to all of you that wonder what clothes to wear to appear more feminine, I have found a quite good method:

You are a good girl, and smart and beautiful and will be even more beautiful once you transition <3

I'm about three weeks past my penile-inversion, full-depth vaginoplasty, and I wanted to document some of the problems I have run into and how I have managed to cope or solve them.

(This is my first post in this community, plz tell me if something is off.)

Despite how a lady at the bookstore “struggled with” my pronouns and bounced off “he” several times before settling on “they” cause apparently she couldn’t bring herself to say “she.”

I probably won't answer many comments. I'm also not gonna make what I say sound more pretty... Sorry.

I am a cis guy, but have been questioning who I am and have a desire to be more feminine.

I've found dating apps to be an absolute minefield, regularly getting my profile pictures (very tame and appropriate pictures) reported on HER for example, presumably by transphobes, before I left it.

So I wanted to just disclose some of the struggles I have had with my vaginoplasty, framing it subjectively as the information I wish I had been armed with before surgery, because I haven't done the work to account for how my experiences compare to others to know whether my experiences are worth generalizing or not.

Do any of y'all have any advice, tips and tricks on dyeing underarm hair? We are thinking of dyeing it for two different prides and just in general with some manic panic dye as that is apparently deemed to be safe for such things and we were wondering how to do it safely (moreso than just using a safe dye), how long it would last etc.

I recently had to realise that seeing the pictures of transition timelines of others is like literally an instant trigger for my Dysphoria. That's why I would really like if could put an NSFW Tag on The pictures, so that I or others dont have to see them if we dont want to. I would really appreciate that. :)

I wish this wasn't my lot in life. I didn't wake up one day and choose this. I identify with being a woman and feel weighed down by being trans and wish that part of me didn't exist. I don't really feel pride anymore.

Hi y’all! Do you have any advice on how to start building a wardrobe of femme clothing?

For context, see my initial post here.

Not fluid, non-binary, or agender. More like a superposition.

If any trans women here have been admitted to a psychiatric ward, I'm looking for advice/experiences. My main concerns are the following:

It seems like, that the longer I am aware of me being trans I keep unlocking new forms of Dysphoria. I never really had any problems with my deadname, but now it does hurt a little bit when hearing it from other people, because im not officially out to them. Today I also realised that apparently I know hate seeing hairs on my arms, which was never a problem before. Hearing my voice also gets progressively worse. What the fuck is this? Why cant I not feel shittier as time goes on. I am on my way to transition, my body could decide to not make my life shit in the process.

I have been trying every evening for the last few days to get a good tuck for an hour or two, but no matter what I do, my balls pop out of place in short order. I tried doubling up on panties and that was decent, but things still wouldn't sit still, and now I have a gaff I've been practicing with. With panties, it feels like they're just not putting enough pressure to keep my sack in place and keep my balls up, and with the gaff, but also to a lesser degree my panties, the crotch is so narrow, my sack will inevitably hang out one or both sides enough that a ball can pop out and hang out in there instead. I haven't tried tape yet because I have done 0 hair removal because I'd rather get that area done professionally at least for the first time, and shaving has always resulted in a red, irritated mess, down below, or on my face. I don't know if I just have a particularly large and fleshy sack that refuses to be contained or what, but if you have any tricks you use, I'll try anything right now.

I'm an average AMAB person: 32yrs old, 180lbs, 5'9" and I carry a lot of my weight in my belly. It gives me a lot of dysphoria and I stress over my belly fat a lot. I definitely don't have a super healthy relationship with my weight.

Here are some basic facts:

Is there a community here that's more appropriate for trans/queer folks to ask and answer more personal and intimate questions? If not would y'all like one created?

Hey yall, names Evelyn!

it like - hurts. like it usually jus hurts wheb crying. bt kinda constantly..,..

I know that it's an awful and homophobic slur but it made me feel weirdly validated to be called a slur that's usually only used on women (lesbians). I don't know, it's weird. Part of me is upset that they called me a homophobic slur but a part of me is also euphoric for being referred to, even indirectly as a woman. Does anyone else relate to this experience?

As the title says, what are your usual ways to deal with acute phases of dysphoria. For me its currently either going to sleep, weed, or trying to do something different so I dont feel like a complete piece of shit and just feel shit a little bit instead.

I had my epiphany moment about 2 weeks ago, and that lead me to explore any resources I could find to help me determine if I was actually trans or just conforming with my friend group, which has an abundance of trans girls. I've considered the question of my gender dozens of times over the years, and always came to the conclusion that I was a man, and I was happy with that, but in retrospect, I was probably just telling myself that because I wasn't "allowed" to be trans because it would take attention and support from my trans friends. The experiences I read here, and especially the link to the gender dysphoria bible let me finally identify what I had been feeling was wrong my whole 31 years of life without knowing what was wrong, like the guy from spongebob who's just standing there on fire. Since then I figured out I am a woman, and because of that I was able to come out to that friend group, I'm sharing clothes with my wife, using a new name and she/her pronouns, I shaved my denial beard, and I've been able to cry. So. Much. Crying. As a man, in almost 10 years since my wife and I started dating, she saw me cry 3, maybe 4 times, but I have been a goddamn wreck since I started questioning because of all the gender euphoria and worry for my wife, who I am forcing to question her sexuality. She previously identified as bi, but felt more and more straight because she only felt attraction to me, but she has started fantasizing about how I'll physically be in the future and is getting more turned on than usual, so the scared tears are over for now and we are still very much in love. It has been an intense, insane, exciting, terrifying, and validating 2 weeks, and without the information from all of you, I would still be in limbo and more confused than ever, so thank you all so much for existing in this community and sharing what info and experiences you can! 💕

I'm curious about people's experience on silicone breast forms. I've been using them for a long time now, and they work well for me, but I find that they are all a tad bit too firm for my liking, they lack a bit of that natural jiggle. What has your experience been, and can you recommend any brands that might have a bit more of a natural feel to them?

Hey y'all, this is a bit of a personal rant and maybe a space for other people to share their experiences in the comments. I'm just looking for some advice on how to make the wait for bottom surgery more bearable.

I've been doing some voice training by reading to my mum from a book (Cornelia Funke's "Drachenreiter" in German) and I've recorded me while reading 2 chapters each in these recordings:

We have searched the internet and looked in a lot of places in it, however, we cannot find any non marketing or general information about them and since we would like to get bottom surgery, it would be very useful info to have.

Things I should bring, or shouldn't bring?

When I decided to finally begin medical transition, I agonized over where to even begin. I had a post here about finding medical professionals, and I did finally find somewhere that seemed like a good fit for me! Opened somewhat recently; a local university and teaching hospital started a "pride clinic" that was supposed to be a safe space for people who needed care that may have needs outside of the realm hetero-normative and cis-gendered people. The staff is (as far as I can tell) all part of the LGBTQIA+ community, or at least allies. I like going to this clinic because I don't just feel tolerated; I feel welcome!

Basically, how long would you have to be on estrogen before you could start getting some of the mental and emotional effects, but before you would start having any irreversible physical effects?

Hi,

Closeted transfem person here who's Closeted because I want to become independent and get my own stable place to live before I come out.

Sorry in advance, I'm pretty exhausted emotionally and I'm not sure what I'm doing. Just needed to spill some thoughts somewhere.

Trying hard to trust the process, and while I have seen other expected changes in skin, hair, and mood, I am getting anxious that nothing is happening under my shirt. I had some minor sensitivity within the first two weeks, but never anything painful.

I want to say it doesn’t hurt, but it does.

Well, I finally gathered the courage to have my coming out to my mother. Overall I would rate the experience a solid 4/10. The first reaction was kinda trash (She replied with, "does that really have to be") and then later complained, that I told it to her at around 8pm, because now she will think about it and probably wont be able to sleep that easily. Some of her not so nice other reactions:

Well, as the title said: I got the courage to finally go out with a skirt. Specifically i would meet up with a friend and his girlfriend in the next city, eat something and then go to the club. The worst part was, when I had to walk through my city wearing it, since Im absolutely paranoid, that anything about me being trans comes to my family through some of my brothers fellow students (he studied at the same University as I do and I am active in the same social circles as he was), since Im not out to them already. The only reason I was able to go to the train station was, since I smoked some weed to be a little bit more relaxed, wore it over my pants (also because it would be cold at night when I was coming back and I also needed them for the pockets), listened to unhealthily loud deathmetal, wore my most comfy hoodie and pulled the hood over my head and completely hid my skirt with a jacket I knotted around my hips. The walk to the train station was pure stress for me. If someone would have poked me with a needle i would probably have exploded like a baloon. After I arrived in the city I was getting a little bit more comfortable and started not covering my skirt completely all the time.

Mods, please lmk if this post is not appropriate for this community

Someone at work that used to be my direct manager had a meeting with me to introduce themselves. They didn't recognize me at all and I didn't want to out myself by disclosing who I was, so I went along with it.

As the title says, do you have any tips and tricks that you think are good for dealing with sudden outbursts of Dysphoria, so you dont feel like shit until you fall asleep (at least that's when the Dysphoria ends for me usually).

So I started oral estradiol 2mg and bicalutimide 50mg about 2 weeks ago. A week in, I started feeling these weird pains in my body. They felt like small stabbing pains that immediately dulled - almost like the pain of getting an injection, and were always in my legs, arms, or chest.

Hi all,

Well, so yesterday night i had tthe "luck" of getting to feel what depersonalisation and derealisation (DPDR) actually feels like.

I recently asked this community how you experience dysporia, however it seemed like no one had the same "symptoms" that i am currently experiencing and Im not really sure what it is.

Well, the egg "cracked" I guess. After 24 years, I've realized that I'm probably NB or trans. Looking back, I think that for a long while now, there's been something in the back of my mind. Like a seed of doubt. I can think of any number of things that could've contributed to it. And it's weird to me because I haven't really felt any dysphoria, at least I can't think of anything off the top of my head. But I know that there's something off.

the label and the manufacturer of my een say not to expose it to light. what happens if it is? last week i did my injection, but forgot about the warning and was holding it up near my bathroom light while i drew the needle. is it still safe/effective? tonight's my next shot, probably should have asked sooner :P

Yesterday I was in a car accident. I'm really OK (some mild brain injury and bruising), the car is not.

Well, as the title says, I Am curious what Dysphoria feels like for you? When/how did you realise, that certain feelings are in reality Dysphoria?