Mountain Goats Addicted To Human Urine To Be Evacuated Or Shot At Olympic National Park (2018)

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According to NPR, the non-native goats have been wreaking havoc on the park by both disrupting the alpine ecosystem and assaulting visitors. The animals crave salt and because the park is not their natural environment, there are no salt licks for them to enjoy, so the goats have to turn to the next best thing: humans.

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I only came here to understand why they airlift goats barrel full of monkeys style.

The mountain goats have been harassing hikers because they are attracted to the salt in human sweat and urine. When the goats see a human, they basically see a walking, talking salt lick.

I would be a standing, silent salt lick.

"Licking Humans for their Salt" could be an alright Mountain Goats song. I have confidence in Darnell's writing prowess!