Not The Onion

Three people who ambushed, threatened, and deprived five space base engineers of their liberty have pleaded guilty.

“We were able to not just point-and-shoot like a fire extinguisher; we figured out how to run it through ducting and distribute it like a sprinkler system,” said Geoff Bruder, co-founder and CEO of Sonic Fire Tech, during the presentation.

“Chinese electric vehicles have become increasingly packed with unconventional features, like built-in massage seats, karaoke systems and a fridge, to stand out in a highly competitive market.

A generalized tendency to believe in secret plots can predict whether someone will oppose the construction of a local wind farm months later. Likewise, coming to oppose that local wind farm can deepen a person’s general conspiratorial worldview over time. These mutually reinforcing perspectives can potentially stall the transition to renewable energy sources if community concerns go unaddressed. The research was recently published in the Journal of Environmental Psychology.

Three of Poland’s iconic bison have been killed after being hit by a train – which, in a sad irony, was called Żubr, the Polish word for bison.

The 94-year-old Transformed Man, William Shatner, is working on a 35-song “heavy-metal extravaganza” for Trekies and metalheads to enjoy.

The plane’s pilot was allegedly fired and told to take a commercial flight home once the team reached their destination. However, he ended up being reinstated after the group realized nobody else was available to fly them back, WSJ reported.