PieFedWhat would you want done with your remains upon death?
I would want cremation. Cremation and a simple marker. I wouldn’t be buried at all at my marker, because I would actually want my ashes spread in two separate places. One is somewhere in my hometown and the other spot, probably around the recreational area of my middle school, where I had commonly found peace at.
My marker would have a Red Sox emblem, signifying fan for life to that team. The other symbol would probably be a resemblance of rebirth/reincarnation as a reflection of my beliefs, so presumably a phoenix would go there. Not entirely sure what exactly I’d want written on the marker. Debating on a personal quote or just say “Logged off for the last time” which references from all of the time I’ve spent being online.
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I want to be scattered at Disneyland (note: I do not wish to be cremated).
Weekend at Bernie’s style around It’s a Small World?
They don’t like that. Whoever scatters then might win a lifetime ban.
Not my problem.
i wonder if anyone has invented the meat chipper
Most landscapers have one.
Ever see the movie Fargo?
Oh yes, I was just commenting on the fact that a wood chipper seemed a bit inefficient when it comes to the harder bits of an unused corpse. Perhaps it would be more pertinent, then, to describe this non-existing-as-of-yet invention as a bone chipper.
*I mean, there is that machine that grinds up offal into hot dog paste, but that’s rather slow. We need something with more *pizzazz*.
I came here hoping to see this comment. Thank you for reinforcing my faith.
Getting tossed in a hole with a tree planted on top so it can consume my remains.
based
I thought about the tree thing alot.
I mean coffins seem so lame… tree is new life, its kinda beautiful in a way that is hard ti explain
I’m in only if it’s one of these: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Manchineel
In the wise words of Frank Reynolds
Don’t have to even be dead, I just want to be launched into the sun because that would be pretty rad.
Due to gravity and your point of origin being earth (which is moving suprisingly fast), its actually very difficult to actually hit the sun…
Oh it’d cost an absolute shitload of delta v, but that doesn’t make me want it less.
9/10 men can’t find the sun
Yes. It’s guaranteed, given enough time.
Technically I guess it could be considered a ride share kind of thing, since I think my remains will have been recycled as a bunch of other people’s remains, by that time…
I wouldn’t even know what people did.
But maybe…
Hide pieces of my body in the vents of Mar a lago.
Let them rot and stink up the place.
Somehow I doubt they’d be able to distinguish that from other Trumpian odors.
About 1/3 will be combined with my wife and her dog who have already passed. Another 1/3 will be combined with my fiancé. These will be scattered in a few different places that are special to us.
The final 1/3 is to be combined with concrete and made into ice cube sized pieces to be taken to different reefs around the world by whomever will take them.
I currently carry a tiny portion of my wife and her dog with me everywhere.
I’m sorry for your loss.
There’s something beautiful about having a plan that detailed to acknowledge that much love you have shared.
I’m not here, physically couldn’t give a shit
Compost. I don’t really care about a marker or whatnot either. Maybe, if I had to; a cherub with a solar powered pump that periodically pees on [billionaires] grave stone or maybe just a simple stone with this meme but, eh. Won’t matter to me after the fact because I am not.
I don’t care, I’ll be dead. Whatever is cheapest and simplest.
Whatever is the most ecologically sound method of disposal.
Donate the useful bits to others, use me for science, then turn me into compost.
Cremation, then throw my ashes in the faces of people on a list that will be provided.
Fun thought, but you’d be asking people to commit felonies for you, to which you would never see the consequences.
I want to be left in a strangers car trunk.
Seems like we all want to be as nutrient-conserved as possible! It’s too bad there are all the rules about proper disposal - I get why they’re there, but yeah, random hole for me. Tree on top sounds great
I won’t care because I’ll be dead.
There’s a burial forest near here, I’ll be quite happy there. No markers, no embalment, no coffin, just a shroud and trees.
Death rituals are for the living, not the dead. Do whatever you need to do in order to get healthy closure.
don’t give a shit
take my organs, practice cutting me up, burn the rest or bury me under a tree that you’ll see grow for decades
Let me rot for three weeks, leave my body leaning on the door of someone i don’t like, then ring the bell and run.
no but for real ill be dead i dont care.
Launch my corpse at a dead planet with water or ice, see if my bacterial colonies eventually seed new life.
Organ donation or medical/scientific use. Whatever parts are not useful can be disposed of in whatever way is easiest.
I intend to leave requests for some minor crimes related to my cremated ashes, in my will.
Nothing too serious, just enough to fuck with whoever executes my will. To…uh… remind them I was thinking of them, and maybe to make them a tiny bit relieved to be rid of my bullshit.
Sky burial. I don’t think that’s allowed here tho.
Cremation and mixed up with my furry companions that have passed on before me. After that I wouldn’t mind being spread out in the far reaches of the wilderness. Be up to the wife really.
But for all its worth Do Not put me on a cemetery.
unfortunately everything i would most want done with the bulk of my remains is illegal in the US. no cannibal barbecue memorial. no using bones for arts and crafts. at least my organs can get donated if anyone needs them, but best legal option after that’s done is probably cremation, and then use my ashes in making a nice ceramic dish set or sculpture or something.
I couldn’t care less, I’d be dead. Let those I left behind do whatever they feel most comfortable with or appropriate to help them get through it.
Put into the ground into a wooden coffin, no crap to try and preserve my remains, a nice tombstone over it
I donated my body to scientist named Frankenstein when I died
Make a marionette out of my body and use it to tell my life story.
A friend from high school wants his hands to be glued to the side of his face, then be decapitated so it looks like he pulled off his own head.
If I’m not cremated feed me to an animal, otherwise mix my ashes in with a bunch of psychotic drugs and let my essence take you on a magical journey.
You know those human cannons they used to have at the circus? I want to be loaded into one of those and shot into a hole in the ground some distance away. If they miss they can try again or just kinda roll me into the grave. I’m not sure this is entirely legal but those are my last wishes.
LMAO I used to joke about the same thing, but the cannon was pointed upwards at a random trajectory instead. For the luls. 😂
Cremation and organ donation. Already written in my living will and communicated to my remaing family
Be sure and double-check the order of those two
Don’t care, I’ll be dead anyway. Do whatever.
I would want to become fertilizer for trees or crops
I don’t care I won’t be there. The living should decide whatever they want, it’s not my business.
Keep in mind that they can be pressured by others into doing something they don’t necessarily “want” to do. Making your intentions clear can be useful.
Remove the bits I’ve promised to those that aren’t quite as fucked as me, yet.
The rest, don’t embalm. If post-mortem is required, no plastic left in me, that kind of thing. Wrapped in linen, dumped in a hole deep enough that the foxes won’t find it, and we’re done.
I’d love to do a mushroom burial. Any disposal of my remains that are friendly to the planet sound good to me. 😊
https://science.howstuffworks.com/environmental/green-science/mushroom-burial-suit.htm
Just mail me to the necrophiliacs, I might finally get some
Necrophilia. A victimless crime :)
High explosives. At least I could go out with a good bang.
Preserve me until we figure out how to put consciousness into a robot body and then make me look like the Major from GITS.
Or fire my preseved body into the depths of space so another intelligence can work on it.
Acclerated to supersonic velocities at very specific people, you know the ones
Not so much what I want done with my corpse but what I’d like to do with my life; die on Mars.* Even if it means lithobraking into Olympus Mons due to a miscommunication about imperial and metric units.
However, I have a few other ideas as well.
Most epic; funeral pyre boat.
Most metal; feed my corpse into a woodchipper and use the viscera for fertilizer.
Most likely; buried a bit shallow under a young sapling.
*: Excellent album by the Callous Daoboys
I don’t think I have any specific wishes. My family can do whatever will make them at peace.
I suggest putting some thought into it. Because when you die, the people who love you will be distraught and overwhelmed. Having some kind of prepared plan will be a gift to them, and honoring your wishes (even if you don’t feel strongly about them now) will help them with the grieving process.
Just bury my body in soil/ground
Wrap me in linen and put me somewhere nice for all I care. Only hiccup is a keepsake I’d likely want to be buried with that isn’t very biodegradable… Maybe I’ll pass it on to somebody?? We’ll see
Mostly don’t care, however I like the idea of the method that makes it so my corpse fertilizes the tree used as my marker. Beyond that, just toss me in a landfill.
Cremate me and stick the ashes in a nice chunk of woods
Ideally? Loaded in to a rocket and sent in the same general direction as the voyager 1
this, i want to blown the fuck up
Launched from the solar system on a path out of the galaxy. Or left in the wilderness for nature to have it’s way.
Cremation. Simple urn. Spread my ashes in the mountains.
I want to be cremated, I don’t care what happens after that. I tell my wife to just put me in the bin.
Hang my bones up in one of those ossuary chapels where the walls are covered in skulls
Put me in a haunted house. Use my skeleton to scare people or in movies or whatever.
Cremated, composted, something like that. I’ll be dead so I’m not too picky. Just as long as nobody wastes money on a fucking coffin.